Wait….what? Why would anyone look up to me? I haven’t done anything that special! Do I really know as much as they think that I know? I am not special…
Just stop already! Does that loop sound familiar? It is possible that your Ego has introduced you to his/her friend “Imposter Syndrome”. According to the Oxford Dictionary, Imposter Syndrome is “the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s own efforts or skills.” Negative self-talk, coming at you, denying your greatness and your divine spark. Limiting language, running your internal dialogue and interrupting your creativity and ability to welcome success and abundance. Feelings of unworthiness and anxiety creeping in and shadowing the smiles and recognition that your soul welcomes. Your inner child having completed a huge climb, only to have the internal bully kick you down to the bottom.
Now if this was happening outside of the mind, many would not stand for it. Grown-ups, friends, neighbours and advocates would speak up and start social media campaigns and find the bully’s parents to share a piece of their mind. The child would feel supported and hopefully find resolution. However, in the mind of the “imposter”, there is an image to keep up, smiles to fake and how does one stand up to a bully that exists only in the mind of the super successful, “lucky” one that everyone is congratulating?
As if feeling like an imposter or fraud was not enough, this feeling and self-talk can lead to anxiety, depression and perpetuates low self-esteem, rather than celebrating the amazing efforts and success of the afflicted. They are shifted from the space of champion to a space of victimhood in seconds, in the most affluent location of unconscious programming, in the mind.
During times where imposter syndrome is present, confidence levels drop and this can impact other areas of life, like in relationships. Remember, we are all part of various systems and when something impacts one, we carry that over into the others. It may lower our expectations for success or create courage roadblocks when moving forward. Previous successes can be removed from self, to an external motivator, like luck or chance, which can prevent one from having the confidence to aim higher, as they fear “lightening doesn’t strike twice.”
The truth is that at some point, even though Imposter Syndrome is a lie, most of us will consciously feel symptoms of it in one form or another, at least once in our lives. It may show up when you get a promotion, become a parent or when you gain some traction with a new business. However, there are some solutions to help you pull yourself, and others out of this darkness.
Be Open and Playful about Tackling YOUR Negative Self Talk
As we grow, beliefs are created and implanted in the unconscious, and they run the program of our lives, like a puppet master…out of sight and awareness. Some of these beliefs fit and help us move forward. However, many can no longer fit without updating, and keep us stagnant at the back of the race. Being able to be open and playful about what comes up is a great way to re-examine your programming without introducing feeling such as shame, guilt and resentment.
Consciously Choose at least one other person that you can Congratulate or Celebrate Each Day
This can do at least two things for us…first, this keeps you out of Ego space, reminding you that it feels good to celebrate the successes of others, and in turn feel good about celebrating your own. In addition, you will be training your brain to look for the good around you, rather than the negative. And second, it is a great opportunity to utilize some role modelling of behaviours that will bring you success as well!
Keep track of compliments
Compliments come forward more than you may realize. Be aware of how you respond to a compliment…often those with Imposter Syndrome are hesitant to accept or believe the kind words coming to them from others. Have a journal or even use post it notes to write what you hear and read them to move to a successful mindset.
Celebrate your Wins
Acknowledging and celebrating your accomplishments is a great way to complete a goal, as it is the reward for hard work put in. It also can build momentum for your next challenge or task. Celebration marks a transition point…we see this with birthdays, anniversaries, retirements, why wouldn’t you celebrate the passage on to bigger and better things? The simple act of acknowledgement is the whisper to the Imposter that you are worthy and successful.
I am a huge fan of Louise Hay, and she was a champion of the positive impacts of mirror work on self-image and the unconscious mind. Connecting with your Soul, the true essence of who you are, is a fairly quick way to shift your energy to a love space. It is in that love that you can quiet the Imposter and welcome the higher self.
Although Imposter Syndrome is real for many, the messages are no truer than snowflakes landing on the sun. You deserve good things to come in to your world, and when they do, know that you are the orchestrator of your life!